Why My Career Needs a Big Wheel

It was hard to say no to $20.00 an hour, 40 hours a week serving as production manager for another feature. The job would have been three months out of Freemont, introduced me to many different hard working people in the Bay Area, and given me some real challenges in a field I have really loved working for. But I need some big wheels until my little ones can run on their own. 

Now what do I mean by this? Imagine your life as a series of gears, all moving together. Big wheels are what give you the most support and stability. Career, Health, Family, Spiritual Life, Community, Partner/Romance. Things move slower with the big wheels because things are less likely to change on those rotors. Not everyone’s big wheel is the same. Someone’s spiritual life might be going to church, it might be finding art in a museum. One person’s definition of family differs from the next, but they are stable and give a sense of connectivity. Romance might be a partner or it might be learning how to fall in love with yourself.

But what’s the key in the big wheel? Stability. Even Bear Grylls takes a knife with him when he goes into the woods, and he isn’t completely on his own  – let’s not forget there is a cameraman there. The poor bastard.

ImageThen you have your little wheels. Those are the things that fill in the gaps – passions, hobbies, adventures, love, entertainment. Those are things that don’t have to be huge, they just need to be what makes you blissfully happy. For me, that is my yoga, my friends, film making, writing, travel and challenging my whole self  to discover. That is laughing and sweating every day with purpose.

At certain times, things won’t always be moving forward. Big wheels will fall off. Little wheels will stop making us feel something. It truly is a lucky thing to have your big wheels and your little wheels be the same thing – to be so at one with yourself that you draw forth the opportunity to let all things be supported by themselves. 

I know to support a passion project you must support yourself – and I know that if I was to take that job that I would spend 3 months completely dedicated to it becoming a reality and none for making a stable place for myself in this world. I feel the same way about passion projects right now as I do about boyfriends – I would love to have one but I need to make sure that I’m stable enough to get into it.

So how do I handle the time in between boyfriends? When I need a big wheel so I can’ t do much of my little wheel? I’m going to see my family and friends, the big wheel I can always count on. I’m going to a film panel this weekend talking about DIY filmmaking and try to meet people. I’m going to continue to search for a big wheel that supports my little wheel. I’m going to continue to follow my big dreams and be big enough to let some little ones go for now.

May all your big wheels be stable. May all your little wheels bring you joy. May both work together. If you can’t travel to India, may you find the best Indian Cuisine and di May both be the same, someday. May you live in pursuit of balance because of glorious self-love. May you be happy.

Sat Nam

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The Envelope – Becoming Whole Information

Imagine someone gave you an envelope filled with your destiny information : everything you were meant to accomplish on this planet – Be a parent. Go to Harvard. Become a raging asshole and inspire people to NOT be like you. Make macaroni art. Travel the jungle via pogo stick and blog about it. Discover a new kind of Kale.

Would you open it? Would you follow those instructions, even if you didn’t like them? Would you not want to know at all?

To be honest, I would probably open it. I’m interminably curious. But then if it was something I hated that I would have to do? I’m not sure how good I would be at attempting. Doesn’t it feel like sometimes we land on that thing we hate anyway, but had to discover that we liked it before? The teacher we never said we would become, the kids we never thought we wanted, the corporate sell out that we hate the message but love the money of. 

In the Piscean age, the time before the Aquarian age we are living in, people handed us the envelope. The letter of the law meant more than the spirit. Women were property. Sin was absolute. God belonged to those who could pay for him. Marriage was between a man and a woman. These were all decisions made from the letter of one absolute truth : we were here to pay our dues and then live on in another life. Suffering, inevitable. We had little information so we trusted what we knew of the small world of letters.

Now, we are living in an age where we have much more information then we could ever get our hands on. Every day we are handed a different envelope, tweet, text, viral video that describes a different destiny. A different way of thinking, expansion. We can travel across the globe in a second via Google maps, see the lives of celebrities on Instagram, and any question we might need the answer to we have it in minutes.

How do we filter through society’s spam folder and open the letter of our destiny? Once we open it, how do we use it to become whole information about the state of our soul’s journey?

There are many ways to do this, and each way is different depending on the person. For me, it’s Kundalini Yoga and meditation. For others, it may be music. It may be running, cooking, dancing, singing…whatever brings the soul joy. But the difference between whole information and retweeted cultural nonsense in our soul’s journey? How we use our body as an informational tool.

In the last week, since moving to a new town and searching for a job? My body has been immensely important in processing whole information. Yes, I had an excellent interview, but am I sensing with my soul that this is the right choice. Am I sweaty during the interview because I know this isn’t a good fit? Am I feeling in my core that this is what will support my life’s path? Do I feel the presence of my interviewer, are they really processing what I am saying? Am I understanding their needs?

When I leave that interview, I have more information than when I left. WHOLE information. I know within 15 seconds of leaving that interview if that will work, won’t work, or maybe needs more time to work for me. No longer am I just trusting my brain, but my whole body with information. The envelope is becoming less of a letter and more of a spirit. I’m opening pages of a book I never knew before. 

Faith, Trust and Intuition is a whole body experience. Use your head, but connect to the heart. In the end, that is where the most information is stored.

May you trust the sensory information you get from the present. May your soul be tied to every decision you make, whether consciously or unconsciously. May you enjoy every minute of navigating whole information because you trust the life you love. May you be consistent in your determination to be a whole working system. May that system work for you, so your destiny may land happily on your shoulder. May you live with love. May you be happy, healthy and whole. 

Sat Nam